hey guys…new updates
just got back from ajmer and lost myself there. For months I have been so desperately in need of Christ’s nearness. I cry out to Him, and He will reveal Himself in subtle ways, but I continue to ask Him, “come close to me!” One morning in Ajmer I got up and immediately went to teach a class of only hindi-speaking kindergarteners. Frustrated with the language barrier I pleaded with God for a way to communicate with them. Then He simply answered “We don’t talk enough, Laura”. Convicted I left the room and grabbed my bible and found a place to talk with Him. He repeated to me my constant prayer: “come close to me, child”. For the first time in a long time I felt as if i was being cradled in the arms of Christ. I lost myself, in love with His safe arms, His gentle touch, His protective hold, the mystery of being near to the God of the universe. As I went to return to the children, I asked that He would not distance Himself from me; I asked if I could stay in His presence, and if He could stay close to me even though those moments alone were over.
He granted me this. For the rest of the day, and for the week since, I have felt the figure of Christ standing, sitting, walking sleeping, even squatting next to me. Call me crazy, but I have never experience that kind of constant intimacy with my Lord. He didn’t seem like He had somewhere to go, and He didn’t seem bored with me, but instead He was content to stay close by me. Our converstations flowed as do that of two friends that sit with each other. Often times I would feel Him help me hoist a young boy onto my back when i felt like i was too week to run around the wheat fields for the fiftieth time that day, or I would feel His hand on my back as He directed me where to walk, and to which child to spend time with. I even remember Him rubbing my back as I threw up one of the LARGE meals we were fed in ajmer. There was never a moment where I felt alone or scared, because He would always remind me how close He was to me. I can’t express to you how secure and wonderful I felt in the constant nearness of Christ. And for a girl who’s always struggled with trust, and has often called herself “faithless”, I found that in His close vicinity, I was finally learning what it meant to depend fully and even recklessly on my saviour. My favorite moment was during evening prayer one night. As the sun set through the windows of the kids’ room, I sat with Him and prayed to Him and was overwhelmed by how He really hears us when we pray, because He is right there. One of the older boys, 14-year old Mohender, stood up and began passionately praying in Hindi. I silently commented in wonder to Jesus that it was so beautiful to watch this boy pray with his whole heart. I then saw the figure beside me rise and walk to Mohender. As the teenage boy poured out His heart to the Lord, the figure stood before Him, smiling, with tears in His eyes, holding the Mohender’s face in His hands. I heard Him whisper: “Yes, Mohender, I am pleased with you. Yes, Mohender, I hear you”. I was greatly moved. On the last day we were there, during Sunday Morning church service, I prayed that I could see that figure again. In response, I heard the Lord say: “Look to your left”. I looked and I saw little Solaimon staring at me with his big beautiful eyes. And that’s when I heard Christ whisper: “Here I am!” I was overwhelmed at the beautiful face of Christ that I recognized in this boy, and the faces of countless other orphans and lepers and street children, and team members since. Here is our King, He came in the humblest of ways, and He is here, hidden in the filthy hands and feet of a bunch of dirt poor little indian orphans. He is in the passion of Mohender and the fingerless hands of the leper. If you have been looking for Him, I’ve found Him!
Anyway, I know this is a difficult concept to get across through a blog, but I hope you can understand my poor description of it. In response to Jessica, the lepers are good. Shanmugavel is in Mumbai but should be returning soon. Raja, Kanapan, Santi, Govindesamy, Supremany, and such are all still there. They are remodeling the temple, making it bigger…we’re praying for it to fall! Unfortunately I didn’t get to visit them this week because there was an issue in some leper colonies in delhi where a *ninja* organization from the states made some poor decisions on how to hand out goods to the lepers and angered some local hindus. Our host has told us to not go for a little while. Please pray that we can return soon. Lincy and Simini and the babies are doing well, and Paru maam will be marrying wilson in may! Please pray for the $2 million needed to buy new land for the orphanage. It will give the children room to play, and will open up countless opportunities for more ministry, including giving me a more permanent indian residence. Also, remind the girls who agreed to pay support to send it to tenn….they haven’t been receiving most of it and they need it. There are now 21 children, and so that means that 7 more babies need support! Keep us in prayer!
Thanks, guys. I love you
Annie Auntie
